Totem Animals

10th July, 2011 : Totem Animals

I was standing in the night, looking up at the sky. There was a boy with me and we were looking at the stars. I could hear the faint chirps of crickets in the background and the smell of the sea drifting in with the wind. I could hear a slight humming coming from the water and headed over there. The boy, my brother, yelled after me, telling me not to go down there. Stupidly I didn't listen and was hit by something in the head. I fell into the water and felt something swarm on top of me. I was pulled under. Then I was seeing myself from above. I could see myself being pulled further and further down, the only indication, the white of my shirt as it seemed to disappear underneath black... Then I bobbed up, lying in the water. My brother was yelling something but he couldn't move forward, as if blocked by  a shield.

Next thing I knew I was sitting at a table with two friends, who were joking about something. They asked me if I had dazed off again... and I wasn't sure but I smiled and joined the conversation. After a while, my brother walked up and sat next to me, he dropped a bag on the table, threw me a grin and pulled a drink out of it and tossed me one. We all started gossiping when a few people walked towards us into the woods. I had a chilling sensation down my back, and cast my eyes over there. I had a strange sensation of seeing shadows following them, small shadows which didn't appear to be anything at first, but which changed into outlines of images I couldn't quite recognise. My brother looked over in the direction I was looking at and put his hand on my shoulder, "don't" he said. I looked at the guy sitting opposite me, he must have understood the look because he swore under his breath and stood up. "Let's get this over with" he said as he walked over and helped me up. My brother and the girl stood up and followed us, as we headed for the woods. We passed a strange looking manhole cover which I stopped to peer down at. It had a lot of gaps, formed in a strange pattern. The guy took my hand and pulled me away from it, launching into an old ghost story about the sewer system underneath, and how many people were murdered down there, and that their spirits lay uneasy, Shaking the idea from my head, we continued through the forest. A strange sensation of being watched and followed by shadows filled me as we headed deeper and deeper in. The voices of the group who had headed in there before seemed to grow softer and softer the further we travelled in.  Finally we came do a dark street, lined with houses. We walked along the dimly lit pathway, stopping at each house to glance at the buildings. Each house had a strange feel to it, nothing felt quite right, and I noticed shadowed animals on the front lawn of certain places. I had an uneasy feeling at each of the houses, until I came to a two story, old Victorian home, with a sold sign nailed to the rusty black gate. We opened the gate and walked onto the front path. This place felt good, almost like home. My brother shifted an uneasy look across the street at the neighbours who were standing on their porch watching us. I walked up to the door, and reached for the handle. Before I could touch it, the door swung open slowly. The hallway lead to a staircase leading upwards, with what appeared to be a kitchen behind it. To the left was a large living room, stacked with a few old boxes, old furniture covered in dust and a musty smell. I stepped onto the wooden floor of the house and it creaked. Stepping through the door way, fully into the house, I noticed small shadows on the floor coming towards me. The seemed to form the shapes of snakes slithering across the floor at me. Startled I jumped back only to realise the entire house and lawn had these snakes on it. They crawled up my legs and around my arms, however they didn't harm me. I stood on the porch and looked down the street. It seemed all the houses had a variation of shadowed creatures. My brother sighed and said, "you had to get us into this again didn't you?" I looked at him blankly, not understanding what he was saying. A shadow snake weaved its way through my hair and dropped in front of me. It's eyes glowed yellowed as it looked into me.

I was taken back to the night in the lake. Around me were different shadowed creatures, climbing on top of me, pushing me under the water, deeper and deeper I went. Slowly the shadowed creatures seemed to disappear into me, A sharp sensation filling me as each one entered. Lastly was a snake, which curled itself around my arm and burned as it passed through my skin. I lost consciousness and floated to the top, where I saw my brother pull me out. He lay me on the ground and I opened my eyes, coughing up water, I couldn't see shadows however I felt different... then I couldn't remember a thing.

Standing back at the house I looked down the street. I could see all the people looking at me, the animals turning, a strange expression on their faces. Then in a rush they all began to come at me. My brother and the guy pushed me into the house, the slammed the door hard behind them, trying to barricade it with the bookshelf off to the side. I could hear slamming at the door. The snake weaving into my hair dropped down again, this time it came close and close to my face. I closed my eyes and screamed as a burning sensation hit my forehead. I dropped to the ground. The guy came over, to see if I was okay. When I opened my eyes, I blinked. He didn't look the same. The house didn't look the same. "Where am I? Who are you?" I asked. He looked at me with a shock on his face "it's me.." I pushed him out of the way and threw the door open. Standing on the lawn were millions of shadow creatures, they seemed to go on for miles. They sat, waiting... My brother stood next to me and said "I tried to keep you from this you know... guess it runs in the family". I looked at him as the shadows crept up to us. I could feel a burning sensation all over, then I woke up.

Prisoner

24th May, 2011 : Prisoner

I was standing in my backyard. Looking at the rock garden in the middle of the yard, the one with the seahorse water bowl for the birds. My dog Fenix was running around back and forth, chasing black shadows that seemed to dart from place to place. I watched the shadows dart, from one side of the yard to the next, more and more of them seemed to appear and they brought the faint sound of humming or maybe it was flapping. I watched as they met up on the fence, growing larger and larger into a shadow. I had a bad feeling about them and saw a lady in our shed out the back. Her eyes were wide with fear as she yelled for me to get inside. I watched as the shadows converged into what looked like a large silhouette of a lady, bits and pieces of shadows darting on and off. I ran for the shed, slamming the door behind me. An old lady appeared and she was dressed in black. She kept trying to open the door and the girl kept screaming for her to get away. She went to each of our windows and tried to open them, so the girl blocked them off with sticks. She kept making promises of better things, if only we would accept and join with her. She went from window to window and seemed to get bigger with each one. The shed seemed to get darker and darker inside until I couldn't see in front of me. I clutched the arm of the old couch that had been left in there as I listened to the sound of banging on all the walls. The door burst open. I could see dark clouds and it was pouring outside. I could make the shape of the old lady coming into the house... and then suddenly I was standing in front of my house. The doorbell rang and I opened the door to find a guy and two of my friends coming in. They said they needed to get to the shed, and I was confused. We walked to the backyard, but there was no path, just a gaping hole in the ground. The guy turned to me, he told me to close my eyes and concentrate hard on being at the shed. I closed my eyes and I felt him grab my hand, and someone else grabbed my other one. There was a feeling of a slight shudder that passed through me. We ended up standing outside the front of the shed. I opened the door to the shed, the old hinges creaking. The shed was a complete mess with things thrown everywhere; the girl wasn't to be found. The guy turned to me and said, that's alright you have some place else to be right now. He touched me on the shoulder, I felt a light shudder and then I was standing in a large field.

The field was covered in patches of dirt and grass and up ahead I saw tents, similar to those you'd find at a carnival. I started walking towards them. There was a newspaper stand and my picture was on it, and a story that I didn't understand. I saw a friend of mine with blonde hair walk past and I grabbed her and asked her what was going on. She smiled a sly smile and said, well since we're not really friends anymore and I needed a story, I volunteered you as the subject. She laughed as she walked away. I walked further down the path and ran into a friend of mine named "Chase". I linked my arm around him and told him he'd be my date for the fair while he waited for the girl he was in love with to work out the guy she was with was a complete loser. He laughed as we walked down the path and into the tent that was designated to us. Once inside, the tent seemed more like a large prison. It was cold and grey and had rooms that were locked up with no windows. The security men then started to bring in prisoners, and put them in different rooms. There was the sound of a fight from the back room, and I headed back there just to see a prisoner run past the door and through the window at the end of the hall. We began to chase after him down through all the people. I saw him head off between two of the tents and ran after him. I jumped and tackled him to the ground. Turning him over and taking the grey hoodie off his head, I saw the flash of the prisoner as the face staring back at me was someone else. Chase caught up with me and swore, He picked up what looked like a round coin off the ground and crushed it under his food as the guy's face distorted for a second, then returned to normal. He laughed at us, and then got up and took off. Chase and I headed back towards the main strip and started heading back for the prison. He was annoyed and I was pissed off that the prisoner had gotten the one up on us. As we walked back, a young boy and his father, both in grey hoodies passed us. The boy gave me a smile as he walked past... it unnerved me. I turned and grabbed the father. The illusion was shattered as the boy screamed and the man became the prison. He swore and kicked me hard in the stomach. Chase jumped at him, and he threw him down. I picked up a chair from the tent next to me and smacked the guy over the head, hard. The chair shattered into pieces as the prisoner fell down onto the floor. I leaned over, punched the guy hard in the face and he was unconscious. The kid stood there, watched, and then laughed. He said I'd never find the surprise they had planted and then he disappeared. I helped Chase off the ground and we carried the prisoner back to the tent. He was locked up into one of the rooms in the back, furtherest from the window this time.

I looked at Chase and said, you know there's a "surprise" in store for us, we need to work it out.  I walked through an open door and saw a large blackboard. There were pictures of it stuck there, and the newspaper story. I picked up the story and ripped it off the board. For some reason I had a flash of the guy hiding under the prison as we headed out searching for him. I looked at him and said, I have an idea. I walked into one of the rooms at the back. There was a toilet in there, but it didn't quite look like a toilet. I began pulling it, and it slowly shifted with a large squeak against the tiles. Chase grabbed the top of it and helped me pull it out of place. Underneath was a bomb. I swore. There wasn't enough time left to diffuse it, so I did the only thing I knew. I picked up the bomb and started to run. I ran past Chase, out of the prison and down passed all the people. Ahead I could see the girl from the shed in a helicopter. She gave me the thumbs up as I continued to run down away from the crowds. People kept getting in the way and I shoved them hard, not caring where they landed. There were only a few seconds left and all I could find was a large bin filled with soft toys. I tossed the bomb in there and headed in the opposite direction. A second later it exploded and I was thrown forward. I opened my eyes, I could smell fire and the stench of fabric burning. Chase was standing there, he offered me a hand and helped me up. He smiled and said 'no point dying until you've finished the last thing' and I laughed at him. I put an arm around his shoulders as he helped me back towards the carnival. The blonde showed up again, she had her camera and was dying for the story. He looked at me and smiled. He said "you know you want to". And I walked over to her. I threw her camera on the ground and shoved her up against the wall. I told her there wasn't going to be a story, not after the last thing she wrote.  She looked scared as I punched my hand against the wall next to her head. She promised to print a retraction, and to leave, and I just turned away. I could feel myself thinking, what a waste of time dealing with her. Chase caught up with me and helped me back to the tent. He sat me down on a chair and looked at me. I stared back and finally said "what?” He said, "You know you're done right?" I didn't understand. He said it again "you're done now" And then I woke up.

Bad Idea

Sometimes I have dreams, and all I can think is, seriously what the hell was that?? This is one of them because I have no explanations at all for it.

15 May, 2011 Bad Ideas

I was standing outside my grandfather's house, watching a million black crows fly across the sky and land in  the trees in the park out the front of his house, not that you could call it a park, it had dirt instead of grass and a few trees lined along the side. No one ever really played there, it was just a path between two parts of the street. The guy sitting next to me swore as more and more birds circled above turning the sky dark. He looked at me and said, "we could just burn it down, birds and all". I thought for a second, it didn't seem like the best plan, but it wasn't the worst one we had come up with either. "Alright, the gasoline's in the back" I said as he walked over and later came back with a small can. He began pouring the gas onto the bottom of the trees and grabbed a lighter from his pocket. "last chance to pull out" he said with a grin. "Let's just get it over with" I said as I turned and headed up the stairs. He tossed the lighter onto the trees and walked up the stairs after me as the flames traveled up the trees. I stood there in the golden ember, and watched the birds fall from the sky. The wind changed suddenly and the first headed towards the house. I sighed and said "Some fucking plan that was".  I ran into the house and started putting my stuff in boxes. My family began to do the same, I kept loading my stuff into boxes, handing them to the guy to put into the van parked in the driveway. More and more things seemed to pile up and I could feel the house getting warmer and warmer.

Everyone threw things in the car and headed towards the road, when my aunt started screaming about a baby she forgot to pick up. Rolling my eyes I looked at the guy from the start and he said "guess we're going back". He turned the car around and we got off, I watched as the other cars drove off. I ran towards the house, the flames getting close and closer. I threw the door open and headed through the lounge room and into the hallway joining the dining room. I turned into the spare bedroom which was a nursery, there was a strange shadow girl standing over the crib. She lifted the baby up and walked towards me. I told her to give me the baby but she wouldn't as she walked past me into the flames. I yelled, but the baby seemed unharmed and sleeping in her arms. She told me if I wanted the baby back I had to put all the food from the cabinet into her bag. I started grabbing at the food and throwing it into the bag, however the more food I put in there, the less food that seemed to be in the bag and the more on the table, I put my arms across all the food and dragged it into the bag, again everything appeared. Frustrated I pushed the cabinet hard and it fell backwards. It smashed into the wall creating a large hole. "Well now you're stuffed" the girl said as the black birds began to flock into the room. More and more of them flew into the room until I couldn't see the girl anymore. I could feel them in my hair, on my skin, everywhere. Everything went black. Then I woke up.